Juggling
I haven't added much recently as there was nothing to add. Is it better to be pointlessly pursuing unattainable women or have nothing to do at all? Both have the same outcome, zero, but the end is reached a lot faster the second way.
Now I am pursuing two, and have virtually reached the point where both know how I feel. One has been told clearly and said she has a problem with men and I have to be patient. Yes, I get the unliftable baggage yet again. Patient? If I get her before the pension age I'll be surprised. The second after over a year of patient development was about to be put out of her (and my own) misery on Friday but a third party made my planned message arrive in a later email. The only difference was I couldn't a) elaborate by email, and b) see her reaction. Possibly ever. So, to continue my mathematical comparisons, there are a few possible outcomes a) she missed the hint entirely (it was a hint that Helen Keller would have got had it been made about anyone else, but herself, so-so) b) she got the hint and was so disgusted she didn't reply and c) she got the hint but doesn't know how to reply. The trouble is I am no better off as if she doesn't reply all three possibilities still could apply. I know no more now than I did before I told her.
What a cunt.
While at the possible fag-end of two women who I have to admit in one case is 99% lust and 1% love, the other maybe 50-50, it took me some time to meet either and if left with nothing to attempt will probably only meet the next by chance as I did those two. I rarely meet women in the official places as singles dos for the over 40s are sadly as much fun as an incontinence convention. And over 40 usually means over 60 anyway and I feel a twat going to things for 20s as I remember how we felt when the old guys turned up to ours. So I meet women by chance. I met one at a barbecue recently, one of the last social events left to me. She was perfectly friendly, apparently single and maybe 10 years older than me. I hooked her not by getting the phone number but offering to show her healing as her own friend refused to try it. She knew where I was and when but didn't turn up, a week or so later I caught chicken pox and she randomly saw me with her friends in the park and saw me covered in spots. No wonder she never came round. I'd never seen her in all those years and the day I do anything that would put her finally off the idea happened.
Meanwhile instead of shooting off the ones who rejected me hang about. Admittedly just before I told woman two I wanted to see her she met someone else and to this day she doesn't know I was about to have a go. The other uses me for free advice and wipes her dogshit covered trainers on me when she needs a doormat for which I get little but the odd gift to try and keep me sweet. And before I knew here dark side (as in pretty dark) it was 100% love and she knew it. The one woman of them all I both loved and she knew it, and she as per usual treated me the worst of all. She needed a father figure and of course incest is out of the question in her eyes. The one who's a friend now tells me I need a makeover. My clothes change every day and my personality is what I'd call satisfactory plus genetic faults. The bits I can change I don't want to and the others are god-given and not within my power to alter. The Americans who tell me they want 'more than friendship' online, with the safety of 5000 miles between us are the polar opposite of the British weird and repressed cultural representatives I am stuck with.
When a British woman (I include women who live here as even the yanks seem to catch 'cat got their tongue' syndrome when they move here) asks a man out the stars all line up and the calendar shows a palindromic number. You know what I mean. It's as frequent as when the cat uses the toilet and flushes afterwards. But like a cat the women can be trained to do so so it becomes second nature. No American women die as a result of asking men for sex, they just get sex or move on, like men have here for 5000 years. We survive the iniquity of rejection and admitting we like sex. Without a woman a man couldn't have sex, so some have to like it as much as us otherwise we'd all be hard up. But tell a man you want it and you turn into Jezebel. This is a sad cultural deficiency and one that has at least contributed to me going on tablets. The selfish attitude and twisted values of the women who either want sex but wait years if necessary for their target man to make a move or the ones who know you want it but act like you've exposed yourself in Brent Cross when you tell them. We can't fucking win. Well I certainly haven't.
Now I am pursuing two, and have virtually reached the point where both know how I feel. One has been told clearly and said she has a problem with men and I have to be patient. Yes, I get the unliftable baggage yet again. Patient? If I get her before the pension age I'll be surprised. The second after over a year of patient development was about to be put out of her (and my own) misery on Friday but a third party made my planned message arrive in a later email. The only difference was I couldn't a) elaborate by email, and b) see her reaction. Possibly ever. So, to continue my mathematical comparisons, there are a few possible outcomes a) she missed the hint entirely (it was a hint that Helen Keller would have got had it been made about anyone else, but herself, so-so) b) she got the hint and was so disgusted she didn't reply and c) she got the hint but doesn't know how to reply. The trouble is I am no better off as if she doesn't reply all three possibilities still could apply. I know no more now than I did before I told her.
What a cunt.
While at the possible fag-end of two women who I have to admit in one case is 99% lust and 1% love, the other maybe 50-50, it took me some time to meet either and if left with nothing to attempt will probably only meet the next by chance as I did those two. I rarely meet women in the official places as singles dos for the over 40s are sadly as much fun as an incontinence convention. And over 40 usually means over 60 anyway and I feel a twat going to things for 20s as I remember how we felt when the old guys turned up to ours. So I meet women by chance. I met one at a barbecue recently, one of the last social events left to me. She was perfectly friendly, apparently single and maybe 10 years older than me. I hooked her not by getting the phone number but offering to show her healing as her own friend refused to try it. She knew where I was and when but didn't turn up, a week or so later I caught chicken pox and she randomly saw me with her friends in the park and saw me covered in spots. No wonder she never came round. I'd never seen her in all those years and the day I do anything that would put her finally off the idea happened.
Meanwhile instead of shooting off the ones who rejected me hang about. Admittedly just before I told woman two I wanted to see her she met someone else and to this day she doesn't know I was about to have a go. The other uses me for free advice and wipes her dogshit covered trainers on me when she needs a doormat for which I get little but the odd gift to try and keep me sweet. And before I knew here dark side (as in pretty dark) it was 100% love and she knew it. The one woman of them all I both loved and she knew it, and she as per usual treated me the worst of all. She needed a father figure and of course incest is out of the question in her eyes. The one who's a friend now tells me I need a makeover. My clothes change every day and my personality is what I'd call satisfactory plus genetic faults. The bits I can change I don't want to and the others are god-given and not within my power to alter. The Americans who tell me they want 'more than friendship' online, with the safety of 5000 miles between us are the polar opposite of the British weird and repressed cultural representatives I am stuck with.
When a British woman (I include women who live here as even the yanks seem to catch 'cat got their tongue' syndrome when they move here) asks a man out the stars all line up and the calendar shows a palindromic number. You know what I mean. It's as frequent as when the cat uses the toilet and flushes afterwards. But like a cat the women can be trained to do so so it becomes second nature. No American women die as a result of asking men for sex, they just get sex or move on, like men have here for 5000 years. We survive the iniquity of rejection and admitting we like sex. Without a woman a man couldn't have sex, so some have to like it as much as us otherwise we'd all be hard up. But tell a man you want it and you turn into Jezebel. This is a sad cultural deficiency and one that has at least contributed to me going on tablets. The selfish attitude and twisted values of the women who either want sex but wait years if necessary for their target man to make a move or the ones who know you want it but act like you've exposed yourself in Brent Cross when you tell them. We can't fucking win. Well I certainly haven't.
posted by David | 5:40 pm
"... It's as frequent as when the cat uses the toilet and flushes afterwards. But like a cat the women can be trained to do so so it becomes second nature. No American women die as a result of asking men for sex, they just get sex or move on, like men have here for 5000 years. We survive the iniquity of rejection and admitting we like sex..."
Uhm. I think you need to blame your own gender for that, my friend, as it was the patriarchal society that women "survived" in in order to get to this point today. You forget that it is still socially unacceptable for women to like sex, note the terms "slut", "slag", "ho" etc. You might get rejected, but a woman might get rejected and then have a group of men calling her one of the aforementioned terms for the rest of the night. Intimidating, no?
I also oppose the word "trained". Using that logic we were "trained" into being sex objects for men, "trained" into it being 'bad' for us to want to have sex, "trained" into thinking female masturbation was 'dirty', and now you want to "train" us into thinking the opposite, just because you can't get a date?
You're making it seem like every woman is selfish for not wanting to have sex with you. She's just not asking you out because she doesn't want to be rejected. Sure, kid. Just keep telling yourself that.
Don't blame other people for your own fucking problems.
err, maybe you should go for the attainable ones instead, eh?
I think I suffer from a case of Victorian values, the ones you say affect women so much. May I suggest you let go of views popular over 100 years ago about female sexuality rather than drag up feminist cliches which only serve to divide and rule.
Being British women here are most affected, American women seem to have little problem telling me (while in America) they want me, so presumably do to their own men as well. They seem to get away with it.
The point feminists missed was they needed to be equal to men, not men. By being equal the work needs to be shared equally, and if women refuse to come on to men because of what medieaval morons think of them who also lynch paediatricians, that's an issue that needs therapy, not a valid excuse for fear.
Pride has stopped so many people in history attempting major goals, as all that matters is whether you win in the end, not how many times you fail or what idiots think of you when it's not their business.
I may not always word my posts diplomatically as they aim to entertain rather than educate but whichever way you put it a biased system is unfair, whatever the reasons, and whether you call it train, educate or stick a rocket up your arse (my personal preference) it still needs doing.
You can't really compare British to American women if you've only known the Americans over the Internet. It's far easier to tell someone you like them when you're only typing it.
My point was that it's NOT easy to change because it is still socially unacceptable for women to enjoy sex. Much less so than, say, 50 years ago, but still unacceptable.
It's not that women still remember that 100 years ago they weren't allowed to speak of sex or whatever, it's that those systems are still in place in society today, whether you like it or not. Get a grip.
I think people need to stop considering the stigma society creates and start considering a different society to keep.
This is silliness.
It's complicated.
With people that I know, myself included, thoughts run along the lines that (for instance) girls that have no standards/qualms about who they sleep with are total skanks - but the exact same goes for guys. Both types are going to get herpes anyway, so nobody minds.
Girls and guys that just like to have a lot of sex, the ones that play the field a lot, aren't that stigmatised. Not from what I've seen. If they are, it's because other people are jealous. Not that it matters, because if they're sleeping around for the right reasons (i.e. not for insecurity/self-hate/means-to-an-end/whatever reasons) then they're also that confident breed which won't actually give a flying fuck what anybody thinks and will have more than enough friends that aren't green-eyed cunts.
Where the problem lies is the complicated bit:
If a guy did sleep his way to the top, it is quite impressive. If a girl did the same, it is quite trampy.
OMG you sexist!
I don't think so. It's not a judgement purely based on the fact of someone's gender, it's a judgement based on the fact that the former is harder to achieve than the latter. By a long margin.
Now expand that to a whole bunch of other sordid wrong-reason sex. There are probably more girls out there than guys, in an absolute sense, that are being little sluts right now. Simply based on the fact it's not as hard for them to pull out the "fuck me" card for whatever reason.
And it confuses people into thinking we live in a sexist society.
We do, but this isn't why.
Well, the email me comments isn't on this blog, so I'm a bit late, but the discussion was doing quite well without me adding anything.
I am just the victim of a rare formula. As I'm attracted I repel. If not physically someone or something gets in the way, even my own stupidity when I was younger. Some women turn me on, some don't, same as everyone else. I even tested it recently when I changed my view on a woman who appeared interested and within a few days she was gone. I haven't even said anything, it was as if she picked it up.
I do know if I'm not interested in a woman I apparently attract many as I'm talking to them the same way I do to men. But when I address the woman in them they become uninterested, even hostile. And yes, the American women over here have mainly acted the same as British women, it's like a disease that affects everyone when they touch down. And in America I wasn't in one place long enough to meet anyone. But they tell me they are like that with people generally in comparison, not just with me. And I have a list of addresses I could shag my way across the states if I ever went again, plus a couple who want to come here. These are just people I've met on the internet like on this blog, not looking for anyone, and most have come on to me. I can't remember one English woman ever doing that, though there are plenty around the internet. That's a cultural difference and one I suffer as soon as I leave my house every day. And yes, all I want is love, and at 46 still waiting for such a simple request will even make a saint bitter and twisted, and I'm no saint.