Friends reunited?
I haven't posted here for some time, having emptied 45 years (46 now) of history there was nothing left.
But I can vent now. Friends reunited? My fucking arse! For the possibility of finding out 47 of your old girlfriends and crushes are now architects and solicitors, living in Spain or Islington with their husbands and 3 kids you have to be ignored by 80% of the members you email and forgotten by half of the rest who reply.
What's the point? I say this having finally cracked the final name in the code, the first of at least 8 Fionas, all of whom were the sexiest women I could imagine. Due to a mystery glitch she'd been registered for three years, but never showed on my screen till last week. But that's just software for you. She's happily married with 4 kids and living the statutory average 300 miles away, so nothing new there. Having nothing to gain or lose I told her straight that before I left our primary school in 1969 (early in my case to go to a 'posh' school) she was my favourite. And I bet my meat and two veg (not much use gathering dust here so why not) she wouldn't reply, which a few days later is still correct. Meanwhile the glitch had uncovered a few more names, and in true friends reunited spirit, the second name had returned to Indonesia, replied but hadn't a clue who I was. I sent her a comprehensive list of reminders, which as soon as the light dawns will guarantee an instant refusal to continue emailing. That's how it works.
All the stories you hear about the site are true in that the opportunity to have a second chance exist, but only happen because there are millions of members and we hear about a handful who got lucky, not the shedload who got ignored.
What I can't handle is why people join if not to contact old friends, of both sexes. I've been a member 5 years and not one person has ever emailed me first. I was a sod at school, I admit, but only to the teachers. I was the school lunatic and rarely forgotten by most. But by 17 or so I'd calmed down and have been a pussycat since as I used up all my fire very early on while friends used theirs when older and far more dangerous. My parents were lucky.
I've met the second best girl at primary school, who now looked as if she'd turned into a prune, or possibly the Idris lemon (who remembers that?) but she couldn't help that. That is the only reunion I've had, and I don't think she actually ever knew who I was as it was her sister who I knew well, and admired her from a great distance, being (like Fiona) two years older than me. Oddly enough she was having it off with her old boyfriend she met on FR just before his wedding day soon after we met. So it worked for her, and he was (in contrast with my school lunatic) the school psychopath. So that hadn't changed in his case, what a bastard!
But in general the results versus the satisfying of curiosity (not to mention the disastrous portrayal of human nature) at FR are barely worth the small annual fee. And if I just wanted to see what they're doing most have profiles you can view for nothing. I paid to reunite, and all I've done is apparently disturb a few hundred people (including a few I'd had intimate carnal knowledge of) who seem to have joined on false pretences. But I think if the rules were reversed and Fiona wanted to cheat with me I'd be on the next plane to Newcastle. In my bloody dreams of course... Arseholes...
But I can vent now. Friends reunited? My fucking arse! For the possibility of finding out 47 of your old girlfriends and crushes are now architects and solicitors, living in Spain or Islington with their husbands and 3 kids you have to be ignored by 80% of the members you email and forgotten by half of the rest who reply.
What's the point? I say this having finally cracked the final name in the code, the first of at least 8 Fionas, all of whom were the sexiest women I could imagine. Due to a mystery glitch she'd been registered for three years, but never showed on my screen till last week. But that's just software for you. She's happily married with 4 kids and living the statutory average 300 miles away, so nothing new there. Having nothing to gain or lose I told her straight that before I left our primary school in 1969 (early in my case to go to a 'posh' school) she was my favourite. And I bet my meat and two veg (not much use gathering dust here so why not) she wouldn't reply, which a few days later is still correct. Meanwhile the glitch had uncovered a few more names, and in true friends reunited spirit, the second name had returned to Indonesia, replied but hadn't a clue who I was. I sent her a comprehensive list of reminders, which as soon as the light dawns will guarantee an instant refusal to continue emailing. That's how it works.
All the stories you hear about the site are true in that the opportunity to have a second chance exist, but only happen because there are millions of members and we hear about a handful who got lucky, not the shedload who got ignored.
What I can't handle is why people join if not to contact old friends, of both sexes. I've been a member 5 years and not one person has ever emailed me first. I was a sod at school, I admit, but only to the teachers. I was the school lunatic and rarely forgotten by most. But by 17 or so I'd calmed down and have been a pussycat since as I used up all my fire very early on while friends used theirs when older and far more dangerous. My parents were lucky.
I've met the second best girl at primary school, who now looked as if she'd turned into a prune, or possibly the Idris lemon (who remembers that?) but she couldn't help that. That is the only reunion I've had, and I don't think she actually ever knew who I was as it was her sister who I knew well, and admired her from a great distance, being (like Fiona) two years older than me. Oddly enough she was having it off with her old boyfriend she met on FR just before his wedding day soon after we met. So it worked for her, and he was (in contrast with my school lunatic) the school psychopath. So that hadn't changed in his case, what a bastard!
But in general the results versus the satisfying of curiosity (not to mention the disastrous portrayal of human nature) at FR are barely worth the small annual fee. And if I just wanted to see what they're doing most have profiles you can view for nothing. I paid to reunite, and all I've done is apparently disturb a few hundred people (including a few I'd had intimate carnal knowledge of) who seem to have joined on false pretences. But I think if the rules were reversed and Fiona wanted to cheat with me I'd be on the next plane to Newcastle. In my bloody dreams of course... Arseholes...
posted by David | 10:12 pm
Never ever use Friends Reunited as a way to find a shag. It's just too complex.
Try going down the pub, getting pissed and chatting to a few women instead.
If they reject you, they are strangers so you won't care as much as if the long lost love of your life decides to ignore you.
The best use of FR is to create an investment-banker profile and retro-join a Welsh school.