Never ever
Ever since I broke it off with my ex it seems like All Saints' "Never ever" is permanently stuck in my head. It's strange because I hadn't heard that song in years or so it seems. Now I'm blaring it as some sort of anthem.
This is my second "serious", failed (or seriously failed) relationship within two years. I've come to the conclusion that I must be a sadistic mother fucker to allow myself to get into these sort of relationships. The kind that move so fast that within a week you're living together, buying engagement rings, and planning a future together based on such passion that could never last. I am an addict to the honeymoon stage, and with that realization comes a few questions.
I don't really change during the relationship, those butterflies and essentially the passion and lust that seem so abundant in the beginning of any new relationship, lasts for me. I experience a slight increase at the beginning but essentially I'm the same at 3 weeks that I am at 3 years. This doesn't seem to be the case for those I end up dating. The first few months are fantastic, sex 5 times a day any place and anywhere you are, hugs and kisses and "I love you"s anytime you part ways, flowers, dining out, going to shows.
I love those things and I have the passion to live that way, so why wouldn't you want to? Why wouldn't you want to look at your partner after 5 years of living together and still feel the same excitement you felt when you first realized you have feelings for them?
Am I just a freak? Why is it that those around me change but I remain the same? Is there something wrong with me?
This is my second "serious", failed (or seriously failed) relationship within two years. I've come to the conclusion that I must be a sadistic mother fucker to allow myself to get into these sort of relationships. The kind that move so fast that within a week you're living together, buying engagement rings, and planning a future together based on such passion that could never last. I am an addict to the honeymoon stage, and with that realization comes a few questions.
I don't really change during the relationship, those butterflies and essentially the passion and lust that seem so abundant in the beginning of any new relationship, lasts for me. I experience a slight increase at the beginning but essentially I'm the same at 3 weeks that I am at 3 years. This doesn't seem to be the case for those I end up dating. The first few months are fantastic, sex 5 times a day any place and anywhere you are, hugs and kisses and "I love you"s anytime you part ways, flowers, dining out, going to shows.
I love those things and I have the passion to live that way, so why wouldn't you want to? Why wouldn't you want to look at your partner after 5 years of living together and still feel the same excitement you felt when you first realized you have feelings for them?
Am I just a freak? Why is it that those around me change but I remain the same? Is there something wrong with me?
posted by Anonymous | 1:24 pm
"Why is it that those around me change but I remain the same? Is there something wrong with me?"
Who knows - you might still like them after five years but maybe they're just not into you. Lasting passion needs fuel on both sides and there's no reason to say "they aren't capable of loving like I can" just because they can't sustain it with you.
Welcome back :-)
Ms. Addams, while I'm sure you didn't mean to give off this impression, I'm inclined to say that your romance is a product of your exercises, or so it seems.
If being in love, and having that passion that lights the world is going to shows, and quiet, "I love yous" as you part ways, than no wonder it fails.
Just like anything else that grows, when a relationship gets older there's a level of responsibility that comes with it. And most times, the fun stuff stops because life gets in the way.
Obviously I realise the feeling you're talking about and I can't say that you're weird for having it for so long, in fact, I envy you for it.
I guess I'm just saying, not everyone can be so focused on the butterflies. When you get comfortable with anything, normality creeps in.
I guess?