Oh For Fuck's Sake Part II

Oh For Fuck’s Sake Part I

Once again, we were in bed all over each other. We were already at that point where sweat started beading on our skin and our breath sounded heavy and paced. Then he did it again. He started talking about "the fantasy." Memories started boiling up in me. I couldn't hold them in any longer, so I said, "There's something I have to tell you."

He stopped and with a blank face asked, "What?"

"Well, I sort of already have done that."

Still blank faced.

"There was no sex or even kissing involved."

Still blank faced.

"But how was I supposed to tell you that nothing meant everything to me?" By then I was in tears. It felt so good to finally tell him. It just came pouring out. I told him the whole story.

I let him know, that even though this is a wonderful fantasy, you never know what you’re going to get. And that’s the scary part.

He wasn’t upset. He understood my affection for this other man. And it became clear to him, that for me, it’s the emotional connection that matters, not the physical side. For him it’s the opposite. I imagine he’ll still try it sometime. I really hope it’s not as difficult for him, as it has been for me.

Afterwards, we continued to have sex. I wrapped my legs around him, so I could feel him deep inside of me. We melted into each other and became one again. He brushed the hair away from my eyes and kissed my neck. I grabbed him tightly and moaned. And we came together.

Maybe our love is confusing and difficult, but we are solid and consistent. We are more than just friends and more than just lovers. We are one. Everyting’s going to be alright.