They say it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all

There have been times in my life when I've wondered whether in fact, I would rather never have enjoyed the ride; that the misery and heartache that followed was not worth the momentary happiness.

I've walked away from relationships wishing I'd never met the other person involved, because eventually all they brought me was sorrow. Equally, I've walked away knowing that if I'd never become a part of that person's life, they would never have suffered the pain of loss when I deserted them.

Someone once told me this was the wrong attitude. That nothing should be regretted, and that others didn't see 'failed relationships' as 'wasted time'. His response to my guilt over leaving my ex in a state of trauma was that I gave him three good years of my life, lots of good times.

My argument is that those good times can haunt you forever. That without them, the misery wouldn't exist.

It's not the arguments or the fucked-up shit that you mourn when you lose someone, it's the moments when you believed you'd never want to be in anyone else's arms than theirs. The beautiful things you said to each other, and the promises you made, are what hurts the most when you break up.

I would argue that, in fact, it is better to have loved and won.

No one falls in love prepared to lose. Although aware of the possible consequences, we always hope it will never end in tears, and remain perfect forever, a permanent state of loved-up bliss.

Some would argue that love is a cunt and never works out that way. But that's what I've always been holding out for. They say 'Nothing Lasts Forever', but I have a hope that somewhere out there there is such a thing as Everlasting Love.

We can but hope...