"The only way to deal with ex-girlfriends...
... is to kill them. How can you possibly be so deeply in love with someone and not care about the next guy she's fucking? How can you watch them together, nuzzling goggle-eyed into each other's necks and whispering the same sweet nothings you whispered once? In fact, seeing them's neither here nor there - to even know that it could be happening fucks with my head. So cutting them off can't work. No, you have to murder them, that's the only way to deal with it."
So said a love-cunted friend of mine, during one of my usual banters about what one does when one's ex cunts off with some next cunt.
I actually used to agree with him*. But of course we were young, and had no idea that time is enough of a healer that there does come a day when you're 100% over it. However, it does take time, and that's the interesting part.
Speaking as someone who's possessive, insecure and forever pining, I find that the amount of time depends on who exactly she ends up seeing after you.
There are categories:
(1) Someone who came before you.
I'm talking about her own ex, or even someone she casually saw before you. Thing is, when my ex goes out with someone she was with before, I don't mind at all. I feel like they've already 'had her' (physically, mentally, whichever) so what's wrong? There is no new ground being broken here. If she wants to go back to them, then that's fair enough and good for her.
(2) Someone brand new.
I am conflicted over this. It depends on the type of relationship they have.
a) On the one hand, if she fell in love with someone cool after we split up, I am totally okay with it. I've dealt with it before (indeed, it's perhaps the most likely situation to come up, in the long run), and though I need a bit of time before hearing every gory detail, it's totally fair enough and it can actually help me see closure, and the fact that she's not mine anymore.
b) On the other have, if she had some random fling - or even worse a string of one-night-stands - I am destroyed. It's the feeling that the person you loved is now sharing the love she gave you with randoms, cheapening it. Don't get me wrong - I don't think there's anything wrong with girls that have casual sex like that, or blokes for that matter - but when it's the girl I've been in love with, just after we split up, then I am ruined. It feels like I've been cheated on, though she's not even cheating on me. It's happened to me before, more than once (as girls tend to allay their sorrow this way, in the short term), and it's never nice. Cunt.
(3) Someone they knew already, but hadn't been with yet.
This is one I'm dealing with right now, and it's a right cunt. My ex had been going out with a new guy (category 2a) at first, and I was absolutely fine with that, to the point where I didn't mind the stories of her taking it up the ass and how picket-fence perfect it all was. Fine.
As soon as she dumped him to go out with some guy that I'd met before and knew while I was dating her - well - welcome to category 3. It doesn't sit well with me because I'll never know if she was harbouring feelings for him all the time - and she must've been really, to some extent. Perhaps it's some age-old alpha-male instinct coming out of me, whereby I feel like I should've warded off any potential new males that I met. In any case, it's cuntish.
So...
If there are other categories that I've left out, then feel free to let me know. This post, overall, is a bit of a diatribe on petty concerns, but it's been interesting me the past few days, so shove it.
* Disclaimer: Nobody was killed in the making of this post.
So said a love-cunted friend of mine, during one of my usual banters about what one does when one's ex cunts off with some next cunt.
I actually used to agree with him*. But of course we were young, and had no idea that time is enough of a healer that there does come a day when you're 100% over it. However, it does take time, and that's the interesting part.
Speaking as someone who's possessive, insecure and forever pining, I find that the amount of time depends on who exactly she ends up seeing after you.
There are categories:
(1) Someone who came before you.
I'm talking about her own ex, or even someone she casually saw before you. Thing is, when my ex goes out with someone she was with before, I don't mind at all. I feel like they've already 'had her' (physically, mentally, whichever) so what's wrong? There is no new ground being broken here. If she wants to go back to them, then that's fair enough and good for her.
(2) Someone brand new.
I am conflicted over this. It depends on the type of relationship they have.
a) On the one hand, if she fell in love with someone cool after we split up, I am totally okay with it. I've dealt with it before (indeed, it's perhaps the most likely situation to come up, in the long run), and though I need a bit of time before hearing every gory detail, it's totally fair enough and it can actually help me see closure, and the fact that she's not mine anymore.
b) On the other have, if she had some random fling - or even worse a string of one-night-stands - I am destroyed. It's the feeling that the person you loved is now sharing the love she gave you with randoms, cheapening it. Don't get me wrong - I don't think there's anything wrong with girls that have casual sex like that, or blokes for that matter - but when it's the girl I've been in love with, just after we split up, then I am ruined. It feels like I've been cheated on, though she's not even cheating on me. It's happened to me before, more than once (as girls tend to allay their sorrow this way, in the short term), and it's never nice. Cunt.
(3) Someone they knew already, but hadn't been with yet.
This is one I'm dealing with right now, and it's a right cunt. My ex had been going out with a new guy (category 2a) at first, and I was absolutely fine with that, to the point where I didn't mind the stories of her taking it up the ass and how picket-fence perfect it all was. Fine.
As soon as she dumped him to go out with some guy that I'd met before and knew while I was dating her - well - welcome to category 3. It doesn't sit well with me because I'll never know if she was harbouring feelings for him all the time - and she must've been really, to some extent. Perhaps it's some age-old alpha-male instinct coming out of me, whereby I feel like I should've warded off any potential new males that I met. In any case, it's cuntish.
So...
If there are other categories that I've left out, then feel free to let me know. This post, overall, is a bit of a diatribe on petty concerns, but it's been interesting me the past few days, so shove it.
* Disclaimer: Nobody was killed in the making of this post.
posted by Juliet is Bleeding... | 9:53 pm
That is actually category 3 - someone she knew while you were still together. Okay, so she knew him quite a bit more intimately than I suggested, but the level of cuntishness is the same.
As for still wanting her, that's fine and dandy. I would still go for the ex that fucked me over the most as well. Doesn't mean I don't hate it/her/everybody in the entire world.
I don't see anybody being confused between sex and love here. Move along...
Well, my boyfriend has this ex that keeps calling him crying her eyes out because I am in his life now and she's not. He says he doesn't know how to deal with her and I am getting pissed off with this girl for doing this!
It isn't the girls fault. I'm sorry to have to to tell you this but if he wanted to get rid of her she would be gone. I have told girlfriends the same thing about ex-girlfriends calling. I would imagine he is leading her on when your not around.
Love is cunt my ex left me after 7 years, we have 2 autistic kids and he was the love of my life, within a week he was fucking some nasty 2 bit polish ho........only for him to find out she was fucking her boyfriend and 2 others Ha ha sloppy thirds for him, serves him fucking right!
You guys must be really young.."I dont mind her having casual sex" get an effing clue boys, the type of girls you are going after are hard core femminists and proboly at least bi.. Do your research into the sexual revolution and how that has affected male female relationships in modern day.. These Fems your seing want one thing..your cock..they couldnt give a fruck about your heart guys..have a pair of balls if you want love and either go after respectful women instead of these flower child trollops or tell them they can wait for the sex until much later in the relationship when there is commintment or even better, till marriage or you will be used till the end of time by these man wreckers, trust me on this one..screen these cunts out on the first or second date use your head!