Cunted Again
My hallmark statement of statements is that I am not dumb.
I am oblivious to a certain point. I am a bad liar. I am a bad organizer of lies.
It was merely a matter of time until he found out. I should have told him in the first place, by all means, and ended it there, but people have a way of talking me out of doing smart things. Hence, I am not dumb, but oblivious and manipulable.
But see, the thing is, I orchestrated that lie pretty damn well. I didn't tell a whole lot of people. I, really, shouldn't have told anybody, but I am not a genius ... merely not dumb.
There was no way you could have known. You were grasping at straws to kick me out of your life, and that thought kills me. I will pick up and I will go on but at least in the end I was more honest than you could be.
[Along with oblivious and manipulable, I also like to believe that I am morally superior to others ... even when I'm obviously not.]
The worst part is ...
I am torn between wanting you back (it was my mistake, after all, right?)
And letting you go your own way because:
1. This relationship would be poison and
2. This relationship has already been pretty poisonous.
But in the end, the image of you in that doorway, filling it up like the paternal figure you were despite my protests. You tuck me in, you turn off the lights, you ensure security by locking the door. I have to live here 3 more months and finish the Bachelor's I never wanted ... YOU wanted it for me. But it would be dumb to stop now, when the finish line is fewer than 3 months away.
I am terrified this will be obsolete tomorrow, that once again the tears I have shed are going to be in vain because you're sorry, because you are going to forgive me too. It's not a completely implausible train of thought: you have given me ample previous action to support it.
In that case, why worry? Why hurt? Because you break off with me and suddenly you call your parents, you tell them when you're coming home. You can do everything that for me, you couldn't do.
It should be clear, but my cunted emotions are eternally in the way. It should be easy.
Just like it should be easy to walk across the street and hit the shrink's office hard. But it's just not.
Come home.
I am oblivious to a certain point. I am a bad liar. I am a bad organizer of lies.
It was merely a matter of time until he found out. I should have told him in the first place, by all means, and ended it there, but people have a way of talking me out of doing smart things. Hence, I am not dumb, but oblivious and manipulable.
But see, the thing is, I orchestrated that lie pretty damn well. I didn't tell a whole lot of people. I, really, shouldn't have told anybody, but I am not a genius ... merely not dumb.
There was no way you could have known. You were grasping at straws to kick me out of your life, and that thought kills me. I will pick up and I will go on but at least in the end I was more honest than you could be.
[Along with oblivious and manipulable, I also like to believe that I am morally superior to others ... even when I'm obviously not.]
The worst part is ...
I am torn between wanting you back (it was my mistake, after all, right?)
And letting you go your own way because:
1. This relationship would be poison and
2. This relationship has already been pretty poisonous.
But in the end, the image of you in that doorway, filling it up like the paternal figure you were despite my protests. You tuck me in, you turn off the lights, you ensure security by locking the door. I have to live here 3 more months and finish the Bachelor's I never wanted ... YOU wanted it for me. But it would be dumb to stop now, when the finish line is fewer than 3 months away.
I am terrified this will be obsolete tomorrow, that once again the tears I have shed are going to be in vain because you're sorry, because you are going to forgive me too. It's not a completely implausible train of thought: you have given me ample previous action to support it.
In that case, why worry? Why hurt? Because you break off with me and suddenly you call your parents, you tell them when you're coming home. You can do everything that for me, you couldn't do.
It should be clear, but my cunted emotions are eternally in the way. It should be easy.
Just like it should be easy to walk across the street and hit the shrink's office hard. But it's just not.
Come home.
posted by Rizi Pili | 5:49 pm
very sweet
bf pulled his gf to his side, passionately kiss her lip. the 2 tongues frenzly rolled and ate each other. their hands around against each other's bodies, their lips passionately sticked to each other, bf and gf kissed each other passionately...
bf holding his gf while walking together..
bf carried his gf with his whole strength..
bf always let his gf walk first like a gentleman..
bf always drove his gf..
bf and gf posed in front of camera as lover..
bf and gf walked side by side as lover..
since the 2 bodies cuddled and loved together, when bf holding her gf's arm up, it's like holding his own arm up..
be friend to your boss.. pay day and pay check..
ordinary people seeking ordinary lives..
normal people know how to calculate cost.. sweet words are kind of cost..
sex is a pleasure, self esteem is for woman and also men...
ordinary life needs to have pay check, pay bill,boss, co-workers, working friends, extended families, families, church friends, friends, etc..
may 2009 be nice to every one
it was what it was..
if God exist, explain self before Him..
the sorrowful and sad efforts over the past 6 years -- from both parties..
reality is reality
rational is rational
daily lives are daily lives
they can be easily understood and perceived..
may God bless all
bf wisphered to gf's ear and gf lowered her head to listen to him
bf put his hand around gf's shoulder and gf put his hand around bf's waist
they posed and walked in front of their friends, their church friends as deeply in love lovers
when people wanted to commit in a relationship he would let the whole world and especially those sweet sexy babes know..
love can be seen and easily perceived by others, may be even kids..
what to cry
what to jealous
love is patient, love is kind, ..always protect..
...he is a selfish person.. don't go back to him even he crawls back to you.. here is my 2 cents..
dunno why seems without her can't survive..
may be people know self the best..
economic reason, pay check, pay day... talk to God, God is kind..
what is meant by Christian.. God is kind
the sorrowful and sad efforts over the past 6 years -- by both parties..
God is kind..
what God is to wifey
may 2009 be good to everyone
to glorify God in this world..
wifey loves God...
the past is the past...
according to the Bible, God is ominpotent and kind --- mentally healthy person is able to understand the Bible
may 2009 be prosperous to everyone
confusion, deception, misleading..
it was said, things are simple normally, do to others what you have want them do to you..
ordinary people seek ordinary lives -- good career, good/faithful spouse, good families, good kids, good future, good retirement... what many people have been working hard for..
the aforesaid are easy to understand..
past is past..
what 'haunted' or as 'nightmare' may be not from those not even could be seen..
people feel comfortable themselves...sincerely
tons of efforts - from both parties.. sincerely and truly
who is to judge?
may God bless everyone
gf felt disappointed and looking up to her bf, bf quickly lowered his head and touched her lip with his lip
sincerely, if God exist, explain self before Him..
what more to say
what more to cry
what more to jealous..
sincerely
may God bless everyone including me
hope u can pick up your life very soon and find love out there, better than his.. sincerely very true from the bottom of heart
God is kind
<3
has been, was, will be..
i could only promise i will be very honest with u..
mental healthy
or just player
have not been dating for 2 years
only recently dating........
he looked could be faithful and committed
not edison
why need only 1 woman by his side? what made the choice
what the feelings
sincere
trust
remember the past
not everyone knows everythings
sigh......
sincerely
sexy coworker
busy work
those share same surnames are of same family
sincerely
wifey expecting
a child
MD said his wife and daughter
sincerely
inspiration
who want to give out inspiration, let her do it
sincerely
Anonymous spam lose.
i nv force u.... sincerely
those who want to give away inspiration, let her do it..
in one perspective, love is a treasure because it is real, from the heart, clarity and sincerity..
anyway
settled and moved on long time ago
wife expecting
child
MD said his wife and daughter
sincerely
after airport
fuck
sincerely
after
bare
together
as a social being in a social world
comfortable not because of those unseen
nth is possible now
nv be seen together
nv be together
normal people seeking normal lives
normally things can be comprehend with ordinary IQ
sincerely
The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (often colloquially referred to as the Mormon Church) is the largest denomination originating from the Latter Day Saint movement founded by Joseph Smith, Jr., on April 6, 1830
the passion in heart could be an enjoyment
the working out of passion is in reality
may God bless everyone
bf turned off the light and watched tv with his girlfriend. his girlfriend lyed on his lap and occasionally looking up to her boyfriend, asking for a kiss. boyfriend gently touched his lip on hers.. they talked and mum in lower lover voices, talking about the tv, friday lover night was great... they cuddled and played each others' bodies.
sweet lovers sweet
social being in social connection and world..
comfortable from own self
explain self before God, if He exist..
wifey passionate for her God too..sincerely..
6 years, past 6 years sorrowful efforts from both parties..
site not despised
tons of efforts
God is good, they said, HE knows
sincerely
win win position
what if wifey in open market of relationship
what to get, what to give
hubby, a family-man type - what for career, paycheck, coworkers, friends, families...
lusts, happiness can be from many sources... internet, eye-contact with co-worker, a sadness of miss opportunity becos of taken, a passion in heart, etc..
i hate that nv been seen together again..
has decision ever been changed?
6 heartbreaking years..
and sorrowful efforts from both parties
it was a sad story
can talk to God about anything, if HE exist..
sincerely
i am sorry, i am really sorry.. he said to her
hubby and wifey sincerely wish u find a marriage and enjoy it as we have been enjoying.. sincerely think it's fm the bottom of hubby and wifey's heart..
it was a very sad story..
love is of free mind..
surely inspiration, paycheck...whatever.. sincerely
it was a very sad story..
yet ordinary people seeking ordinary lives.. not as high profile of mother teresa glorified her God in this world.. sincerely..
may God bless everyone.. sincerely
progression?
fm do anythg to dun touch me, ha ha
past 6 year sorrowful efforts - fm both parties
as we are in a socially connected world
it is ordinary for ordinary people seeking ordinary lives..
hubby fucked wifey brain out
what more to say
what more to cry
bare after
together dawn
may everyone be blessed
holding hands touring around
shopping
talked in lovers' voice to make decision on shopping
posed as lovers in front of camera
kissed in front of camera
queen size bed
put her hand around his waist
put his hand around her shoulder
sweet lover walk
night
fuck
may everyone be blessed
it's not bcos of those groups around may be..
he made clear to his church friends... she is my girlfriend 7/24, i will stand by her side every moment i could..
so how could girlfriend 'fierce' to her boyfriend, or as he 'said', how could his girlfriend 'strike back' :)
nobody can say anything on his decision which he showed it explicitly and clearly in front of his church friends..
as sexy co-workers (all that have been), he might have showed people something (flirk, eye-contact.. like lh, ta.. etc) so those girls had the courage to show him intimacy like exchange text, appearing 'together' in front of group, sitting on his chair, etc..
what things are free in this world? eye contact, flirking have cost.. cost may be showing his intimacy to girls in front of people, etc..
likewise.. is love meant to 'tremble', step over, etc..
he said to her.. i am sorry, i am REALLY sorry..
it was a sad story..
in his words, truth in himself..
not all people are mentally healthy..
past year sorrowful efforts from both parties..
in my mind, when i love a person, i would love to spend my time together with him/her for the rest of life, i want to learn to live with him/her, we will live as couple and joint partnership together, whenever she is there i am in reality, i like to share my daily lives together in reality.. we don't want to be apart in real life, there will be a real life husband and wife..
it was a very sad story
past sorrowful efforts from both parties
may everyone be blessed
everyone can start over and have new life
story ended itself
the past was past
may God bless everyone including me
common sense?
if is mentally healthy, whether romantic love to a person in real sense lie in the truth in himself..
some rely on religion as their ultimate source/strength -- ask him/her who stretched out their hands as like crying to their 'God;... sincerely
love is an expensive stuff, it may not be an inborn element, is something to learn, like much success and attribute in this world, something to attain through tons of efforts --- so hubby and wifey have been wise in learning love and putting it in practice in real life - that's what make lifelong marriage successful...
in the same token, flirk, sex, passion in heart, romantic feelings etc are joy that can be enjoyed right away, similar to an instinct, no matter what races, what culture.. etc..
may be so report says, man on average 23 sex partners in life and woman 17 and divorce rate is 55% out of 100 married couple..
achievement in real physical world need efforts
cyber, is an infinite mind enjoyment
all have been said
nothing said is new or wise sayings
may God bless me and my family because of past efforts
if God exist, explain self before Him... sincerely
the man had been on my bed or i have been in the hubby's heart... especialy the man is tall, handsome, cool, smart, very acceptable in this pragmatic, practical and competitive world, not like a chicken, strong and stern, fight for rights..
similarly what man dun want a best job in a society, though garbage taking is a kind of success too...
ordinary people seeking ordinary lives
not high profile as mother Theresa live among and as Indian, for what
in economics, people are rational, all know what self-interests are and making rational choices..
flirk, one-night stand, living together, open marriage ... all people's choice because they are adults, make own decision
sincerely
rational behaviour and rational choice are basis in economics
beckham - we will always be husband and wife
adult can seek mentor, inspiration, advice.. decision is rest on own self..
when people want to do things in real world, they would do it
why a man married his woman, mentally healthy man can have a list of reasons why, if he want to share it...
every things with intention and people know what own intention, if mentally healthy
explain self before God, if He exist, sincerely
may God bless me and my family because of tons of efforts, good intentions
ordinary people seeking ordinary lives
people doing things they feel good
sincerely
those share same family names have been supporting each other and helping each other out, and naturally from and to families as a whole.. sincerely
not sure what is meant by love
people say love in heart, passion in heart, love or whatever..
i could say everyone has values, rational people would do sensible deals and things like how and what to buy for yourselves and at what cost and benefits, etc..
dream is good because it is inspiration and force for a pragmatic, cold, plainful reality, without it or hope, life full of dramas to cope with..
anyway may God bless me and my family because of past tons of efforts..
people feel good about themselves to attain good lives
it's understandable
history is a reminder, to remember
some mistakes cannot be afforded repeat
i think you should move on!cyprus escorts